Thursday, August 26, 2010

Wild Hat in the LoC

A while ago I was in the Library of Congress and noticed- I could hardly not notice- a woman's hat. It was sprouting flowers and sparkly things and feathers in the brightest colors, and was so completely out of place sitting on top of the short, dumpy woman in the calico house dress. I stared at her on the steps, couldn't take my eyes off her in the upstairs hall, and was surprised by her again in the special display on Native Americans. I began to think I should say something, since she must have noticed me staring. But, what?

I went to use the restroom, and when I came out of the stall, there she was, horrific hat and all, washing her hands. I decided I would speak to her. I couldn't say I liked her hat- that would be too blatant a lie. I decided on, "Your hat is so interesting!" Which was very, very true. But, as I opened my mouth to speak...

She bent over and pulled from her bra two large, hard-back books! My jaw hit the sink and I stared at her. How was that possible? She rearranged herself, tucked the books back in, and walked out of the bathroom, all while I stared, the hat all but forgotten.

I saw her again, as I was leaving the library. She was going through security just before me. She opened her bag and the security officer poked his stick around looking for stolen books, nodded his approval, and she walked out the door, wild hat, books in her bra, and all. I wanted to say, "Um, sir? I think there is somewhere else you should check!" But I didn't.

I ask. What would you do?

6 comments:

inkylou said...

Oh my . . .

Kawbie said...

I would have totally narked her out to the guard. I would have said to them, "You need to check her bra. I saw her put two books in her bra in the women's restroom." The thought of the books leaving the Library of Congress as stolen goods would be too much for me to take.

Anonymous said...

Well not that this is what you want to hear but I would have said something. I am not shy about things like that. That is very strange and sad.

Gracewanderer said...

Rat her out before she gets to security. It's not like she'd be hard to identify - "The lady in the insane hat has books in her bra."

Rachel said...

I laughed out loud! It's like something out of Everything on a Waffle! Thanks for sharing. =)

Anonymous said...

Wow! She sounds like someone straight out of a book!